032 - Bullies

Post date: Nov 30, 2015 9:11:02 PM

Counselor Notes 32

January 20, 2015

Bullies

Today’s parents remain concerned about the issue of bullying in schools. According to http://www.brighthorizons.com/about-us/child-care-news/bullying-tops-concerns-for-parents-of-school-aged-children/ :

“… bullying remains the top overall school-based concern for today’s working parents with nearly eight in 10 saying it worries them. It remains the top concern regardless of the parents’ geographic location, income, or whether they live in a rural (84 percent), urban (78 percent) or suburban (77 percent) community. It was also the top concern for both moms (83 percent) and dads (75 percent). Younger working parents, those between the ages of 18 and 49, are more likely to be concerned about bullying (81 percent) than those 50+ (71 percent).”

The term “bully” gets thrown around a lot these days so let’s start with taking a look at what bullying is and isn’t. Bullying occurs when an individual repeatedly and unfairly uses their physical power (ability to inflict physical pain,; i.e. beat another up), social power (ex: exclude others from a group), and /or emotional power (i.e. hurt another’s feelings; ex: mean teasing). Thus, while all bullies are acting in a cruel manner, not all children who do something mean are bullies.

In Guidance class, we will specifically address the issue of bullying in the next few weeks. This goes for students from kindergarten through third grade. Yet while we will address it in school, I really could use some parental help at home. From my point of view, the roots of bullying are in our culture at large. Let me explain what I mean.

To me, bullying is an extreme example of one person’s lack of consideration for another. This problem is not unique to our schools. It is also something that children will see a great deal of in the world today. I would ask parents who want their children to live in a world in which people have consideration for others to point out to their children instances where they see it and where they don’t.

Some places where examples of inconsideration may pop up are: when politicians start talking about their opponents; incidents of violence in the news; television shows and commercials; sporting events; drivers out on the road; and of course how we interact within our own families.

We should of course endeavor to raise children strong enough for this world. In attempting to do so, we will fail them if in the process we should make them inconsiderate of their fellow man.

Doug Muha Ed.S.

School Counselor

Waverly Elementary School

muhad@hcss.org